Wednesday, May 2, 2007

Stormy Nights


The low rumble of thunder can be heard in the distance. Tree limbs thrash violently outside as strong winds make their way east. Rain still falls.
The main storm passed by almost an hour ago. My wife sleeps peacefully next to me. It is dark, very dark outside. An excellent time to reminiscent about days gone by. So many years have gone by, so many memories. Time changes some of those memories; some for better, some for worst, and some just fade away, to be lost forever.
I have sat through nights like tonight many times before. In Eagle Pass, when I was young. I listened to the rainfall outside my window. Felt the cool spring breeze flowing lightly through that open window. Wide awake, thinking about the future.
In El Paso, sitting by the dorm window. The glass so thick no sound came in from the outside. Seeing the rain fall on two countries, thinking about then. The outside looking so unreal. Like watching a TV.
And tonight, I think about yesterday. What was then, what I did, what I felt. Not many regrets on what I did or said. More regrets about what I didn’t say, didn’t do. I think about my father…. So many question I should have asked…. So many things I should have done. He was a great person. Some friends I should have kept…. My brothers and sister…. I should have spent more time with them, gotten to know them better. My sons, so many things I needed to do with them when they were little, when I could still hold them in my arms. And them my wife…. So many things I should have told her…more that I have told her….I will tell her I love her again this morning. I don’t want to regret not having told her enough times.